The #1 Benefit Of Working With A Sex Therapist | Sex Therapy Near Me
What Is The #1 Benefit Of Working With A Sex Therapist?
You skip past GO like you’re in Monopoly and aren’t afraid to open up to a sex therapist!! The number one reason is that 1 in 10 therapists talk to their clients about sex, and this has been an ongoing statistic over the years that has needed more research. According to a research study done and published by the LA Times, 87% of Psychologists admit and reported they do not talk to their clients about sex. PESI has an article in the past couple of years illustrating that 1 in 6 therapists don’t talk to their clients about sex. In many topics with others therapists in Minnesota and across the US, I have learned there’s a key theme, if the therapist doesn’t bring up the conversation about sex the client won’t. Kind of sad when you’re working in therapy on your goals right? This is why I recommend working with a sex therapist specifically for therapy because more than likely you’re going to be able to talk to them about anything! Can we treat every DSM-diagnosis disorder? No. Is that our job? No. Sex therapists niche in this area for many reasons and a common one being let’s fucking open up the conversation about sex and reduce the shame attached to it! Sex therapists specifically have the knowledge, training, and skills to talk to their clients about sex. If you are seeking sex therapy, or have an interest in talking to a therapist about sex, then do yourself a favor, and hire a sex therapist. Skip all the searches and seek sex therapy near you or in your state!
How To Find A Good Sex Therapist…
Yes, we’re going there! Honestly, as a sex therapist who has worked in the field since 2018, it has been a hard pill for me to swallow that there are fabulous, neutral, and fucking awful sex therapists out there. Being a therapist who has sat on both sides of the couch, I want to give you the mistakes I made when seeking therapy and how to find a good sex therapist for you!
Let’s start with what TO do…
Do take your time researching sex therapists near you
Do multiple sex therapy phone or online consultations
Do ask how that sex therapist works in sex therapy, what tools, interventions, and sex therapy exercises they focus on
Do choose a sex therapist who inspires you and, whom you feel a connection with when you read their profile, website, content, or blog posts
Do pay attention to your intuition when choosing a sex therapist and make sure not to gaslight or question yourself
Do have an abundant mindset when paying for sex therapy, the person that feels best to work with is the best to work with, and you’ll start thanking yourself that you took the leap and did the damn thing with the sex therapist that’s best for you
Do remind yourself of your “why” why you’re wanting to work with that provider and why it has been invaluable to you
Here’s what NOT to do…
Don’t scramble at the time of crisis to seek sex therapy, start sex therapy services, then not like your sex therapist and ghost them
Don’t even bother trying to use insurance, the care is different for therapy - when I’ve used insurance for my therapy, I didn’t feel like those therapists were prioritizing my care, they were often late for appointments, watching their cat in the background of the session moving around, gave me unsolicited advice, which yes was shaming as fuck, and no I didn’t ask for it, they didn’t check in on our rapport, and they were often very generalist therapists who didn’t give me what I needed and I had more training in the areas than they did with what we were working on at that time. I’m just sharing my personal experience as a therapist in the field who has been on both sides of the couch, multiple times. Learning what I know now from this experience, I will prioritize my mental health, budget for therapy, and pay out of pocket because the care is so different. Oh and sex therapy is not covered through insurance codes, so don’t bother.
Don’t just jump into sex therapy or therapy with a provider, take time with your research when looking for therapy near you
Don’t go with a sex therapist because they’re a cheaper price than others you see out there, the one with higher rates is prioritizing you, yourself, and their other sex therapy clients to make it the best experience in sex therapy possible
Don’t wait around for sex therapists to contact you back, the ones who want to work with you will reply right away and prioritize you - At the end of 2021 there were 1.6 billion people on waitlists for therapy, if your sexual health and mental health are worth it, you will prioritize yourself and so will that sex therapist
Don’t sexualize sex therapists, we are here to treat DSM-5 diagnoses, not be an object of your desire and harassment
The list could go on and on, and thanks for my Ted Talk with my personal experience as a therapist who’s been to therapy :) Maybe that could be a blog later? Thoughts? Anywhoo, let’s keep going with some more
Who Is Sex Therapy For?
Arguably, everyone needs sex therapy! Why? The number of times I hear, “My parents never talked to me about sex,” “I can’t ask my parent about their sexual health and if there was anything biological or genetic that could affect me now!” “I never got a proper sex education,” “What’s andropause?” “What are wet dreams?” “What is perimenopause?” “Why is this medication affecting my sexual libido?” “I didn’t know SSRIs reduce sexual libido after 6 months!” “What are pronouns?” “What does it mean to be sexually fluid?” “What is internalized homophobia?” “My family grew up Catholic, we never talked about sex, it was so shaming!” “I was never taught how to masturbate, what are the techniques?” and this list goes on and on. If you shook your head, yes, nodded, or even laughed because you relate to a lot of these questions, you more than likely need sex therapy. Here are common sexual functioning symptoms I treat and topics that people seek out in sex therapy.
People seek out sex therapy for…
Gender Dysphoria, Gender Euphoria, & Gender Affirming Care for Transitions
Premature Ejaculation, Delayed Ejaculation, Erectile Functioning Struggles, Performance Anxiety
Struggles with Orgasm, Desire/Interest/Arousal, Genito Pelvic Pain
Shame Related To Complex Sexual Trauma, Sex Negativity, and Beliefs
Sex Education, Sex Later On In Life, When Sex Changes
Questioning Their Gender, Sexuality, If They Are Kinky or into BDSM, & Polyamory Relationships
That is a very small list and it can go on!
Final Thoughts On Starting Sex Therapy
If you’re still reading this blog at this point, and you’ve been contemplating starting sex therapy for a while, just do it! Here is your sign to jump right in and see who is the best sex therapist for you. Sex therapy will help you in so many areas of your life, that you’ll be unstoppable when it comes to advocating for what you want! Sex therapy doesn’t need to be scary, it can be fun, incorporate lots of sex therapy exercises, build rapport, and create the therapy time collaboratively with your sex therapist on doing what’s best for you boo! If you’re seeking sex therapy in your state or area, but don’t know where to start, feel free to reach out to me today! Unsure if it’s sex therapy or sexual wellness coaching you need? Read my previous blog on this and check out my sexual wellness coaching page if you want to work with me in life coaching for sex!
If you have sex questions, then consider purchasing an email consultation with me for Q&A. This is a service through my business because I know sometimes people want questions answered :) Please read the terms of service on that page.
If you want to work with me in therapy, couples sex therapy, sex therapy, or self care therapy, sexual wellness coaching, life coaching, then Book your consultation here today!
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If you are looking for help with Sex Therapy, Couples Therapy, & Self-Esteem, you can read more about how I can help on those pages. If you are seeking Sexual Wellness Coaching Services or Holistic Healing Services, click on those links! If you are a therapist in Minneapolis or outside of Minnesota and seeking Consultation Services, Pick Your Brain 1:1 Consultation, or a Speaker or Trainer for Your Next Workshop, I can help here too! Let’s get started on your Shameless Goals in Minneapolis, MN today!
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